If a penis went through public school education and could dress and style itself, it would most likely end up resembling Boris Johnson; an unthinking, testosterone-driven, caddish buffoon who, inexplicably, was elected mayor of the Capital. Clumsily offensive and hopelessly prone to scandal, some of Boris’s ‘best bits’ so far include offending the whole of Liverpool in one fail swoop, using the word "picaninnies" to describe Congolese people, and aligning gay marriage and bestiality. Somehow, though, he manages to bumble his way through all these scandals, getting more and more ‘adorable’ every time. As Charlie Brooker perfectly summised this phenomenon: “OMFG LOOK AT HIS FUNNEEE HAIR LOL!!!! BORRIS IS A LEGERND!!!!”
This week, though, in response to allegations from Labour assembly member Jenette Arnold that Boris displays a “disrespectful and patronising way at meetings” to female assembly members, not shown towards their male counterparts, the Conservative mayoral candidate has denied being “remotely sexist”, claiming to Mumsnet (with a baffling lack of elaboration) that he is a “feminist”. This isn’t particularly convincing against a track record including the election soundbyte that “Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.” Ha ha ha ha!! What a hoot!! Having a wife is like having a car!! ROFL. But to give him the benefit of the doubt, let’s assume that this is classic postfeminist wit, and look at these allegations a little more closely.